Bad Mood

I am in a really, really bad mood today. I don't know if it is hormones or the fact that my coworkers and boss are really rude to me and a couple other coworkers. I don't know, but whatever it is, it is bringing to the verge of tears. I don't understand how people can be so rude and not even realize how rude they are, and one of these individuals is my boss! Or maybe they do realize how rude they are and they don't care. I'm beginning to wonder if my boss is trying to push myself and a couple coworkers out of our jobs so she can bring others in. She might get her wish soon if I manage to find a job away from this place.

Anyway, to discuss the issue of which this blog is actually about -my temperature rose a bit today to 97.9. I'm not sure if that means I finally ovulated or not since it didn't raise that much. Before this morning, I was beginning to wonder if my thermometer was broken, but it turns out it isn't - I used two different thermometers this morning and they both said 97.9. Hmm, so much for that theory.

I can't get over the fact that I feel so depressed over what some coworkers are doing to me. I shouldn't care, but I do. It could affect what jobs I am given as opposed to others who work here - it could affect what others are able to get away with - while if I did the same things, I would not be treated as well. It's just frustrating. I desperately need a new job. This job could be what is causing my temp issues - I could be stressed - though before the last couple days, I haven't felt particularly stressed.

I don't know. Hopefully something good will happen to me soon regarding getting pregnant then maybe I could tolerate this job a little bit more because at least I would have that going for me. I hope that this herbal medicine helps.

Anyway, that's all for now. Until next time.

You'll Never Guess

Guess what? My temperature, once again, did not go up. My acupuncturist agrees that something weird is going on. Who knows what. She did give me some liquid herbal medicine to take - 3 times a day. I put it with my cranberry juice and it makes it taste like I'm drinking cough medicine - not really that tasty but at least it isn't as bad as I thought it would be. Of course, maybe it would taste worse if I put it with water. I'm a little nervous to try that to find out, but I probably will just so I know.

In other news, earlier today I was not in a happy mood - in fact, I started to cry a little bit. I have no idea why - you would think I was going through PMS right now, but that doesn't seem likely with my temp still down at 97.5.

Well, anyway, I don't have much else to say right now. Until next time!

Updates

1) A while back I wrote about that show on NBC called Inconceivable - well, it looks like it has been cancelled - thank goodness.

2) Another entry I wrote recently mentioned a Newsweek article written by a woman going through infertility and the letters that Newsweek printed in response to that article. Well, the author of the article wrote about the comments that were made in response to those letters on a blog called The Naked Ovary.

3) Another infertility comment - I was just reading that Adam Corolla (best known for The Man Show) and his wife are going through infertility. He currently has a show on TLC called The Adam Corolla Project. Apparently, on this show, they combine the renovation of a home with infertility and some people think that the two together make an odd combination. I'll agree that it's odd to put those two things together in a show, but it seems to me it makes for a more realistic show if we see what else is going on in a person's life besides a renovation.

CD26

Yep, it's now CD26 and still my temperature is low (97.5). I have never had it stay this low in the whole time I've been taking my temperature - which has probably been about 3 1/2 years now. I'm really concerned about this. I would really like to know what's causing this to happen. Acupuncture? Exercise? Something else?

Speaking of acupuncture - tonight is my 3rd visit. Tonight, my acupuncturist is going to give herbs and other such stuff to help with my infertility. PLEASE let this work. PLEASE! I've heard how gross some of the teas can be, but I am really willing to try anything at this point. It's been close to 4 years now since we started trying. It's amazing that there were times that I was actually scared of being pregnant because I wasn't married yet and I didn't have a stable job. Now, I almost wish I was pregnant way back when even though I wasn't ready. Though, I probably would have had the same problems I'm having now.

Anyway, moving on. Do you know what's a good way to motivate me to start running? Having two women behind me on the path around Greenlake talking about being pregnant and how sometimes they wish that the baby would just come out already. Yeah - I had to start running after I heard part of that conversation. Perhaps I'll need those women behind me this weekend when I run the Dawg Dash race (5K race at UW) this Sunday.

CD24

Today is CD24 and my temperature is still low - 97.3. Is acupuncture making it so my cycle is changing for the worse? Will things get worse before they'll get better? Or is it the fact that I've been exercising more than I have been in the recent past? I just don't know!

It's so frustrating not to know what is going on with your body and to not know what is causing problems with you getting pregnant!

I'm curious to know what's going to happen tomorrow with my temp. usually my temp will drop like it did today right before it goes way up - normally, a sign of ovulation with me - or supposed ovulation anyway.

Anyway, that's all that's going on in with my world with respect to fertility. Until next time.

What's Going On?

Well, I was going to start writing more on my other blog, but with this kind of stuff, I just don't feel comfortable sharing it on the other blog because my friends actually know about that one - they might know about this one too - I'm not sure though.


Anyway, today is CD 21 and guess what? STILL no sign of ovulation. I'm not sure what's going on with my body. Ever since I got off of BC pills, I've had pretty regular cycles - around 31 days - but for the past couple or so months, it's been really weird. I hope that things start normalizing - we'll see what happens!

Until next time.

Stuff

On my main blog, "It's All About Me", I wrote a big long post about infertility. Normally, I would write that stuff over here at this blog but it's just easier to keep up on one blog rather than 2 or 3. I will continue to write on this blog, but not nearly as much as my other one.

Anyway, for stuff that I didn't write about on the other blog (because my friends really don't want to know this level of detail) - I am currently on CD 19 and I still haven't ovulated! Is it because I've been exercising more lately or what? This cycle is starting to end up like the last one - a REALLY long one. I've started acupuncture - so far only 2 treatments - and this last treatment the acupuncturist put needles in areas supposedly to help with fertility. What's weird is that after that treatment, I felt some discomfort in my abdominal area - like I was starting to have cramps from AF visiting. Just odd. If I had ovulated, then I would deem the cramps are due to that, but I haven't yet. My body is completely broken - I hope that the acupuncture can regulate my cycle like the acupuncturist said it could.

Alright, well, that's all for now. Until next time!

Update on Me

I just realized that I never mentioned what happened after my last post about my cycle. AF just show up eventually - unfortunately. I should know better than to think that it would actually happen. After almost 4 years, is it actually going to happen? It's hard to keep my faith when each month it doesn't happen.

I'm hoping that my trips to the acupuncturist will help. I recently started going to an acupuncturist for my back pain and for infertility. Tomorrow will be my 2nd trip there. I really, really hope that this can help me out so I don't need to go back to the fertility specialist. If it doesn't work, I'll probably end up going back to the specialist at the beginning of the year, but we'll see. It's very tough financially, emotionally and physically to go through all of that. I just want to know why it just can't happen? Why can't I be a normal woman?

Anyway, right now I'm on CD 16. According to fertilityfriend.com, I should ovuluate tomorrow, but who knows with me. I might not actually be ovoluting. I'm starting to wonder if I have PCOS - I've had so many cysts in my past, so it certainly is possible.

Well, that's all for now. For those that may read this blog and are curious about my day to day life, I write more on my other blog called "It's All About Me". Until next time.

UGH!

So now Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are having a baby?