birth control and PPD

Last Friday, I went to my OB for an IUD. At first, it was a bit painful - felt like period cramps but everything seems to be o.k. now. I'm still finding it funny and surprising that I even have to be on birth control considering how long it took to get pregnant in the first place but I don't need any more surprises. I absolutely adore my little guy - my Nicholas - and couldn't imagine my life without him, but, at this time, I don't think we will have any more children.

I also went to talk to her about post-partum depression. She gave me a list of psychologists I could go see, as well as a low dose of an anti-depressant. I need to figure out which psychologist to go see - whichever one is closer to me and well, one that insurance will cover (if they do). Most of the time, I feel alright. There are just some times that I just cry for absolutely no reason or when I feel overwhelmed with things I want to do before I go back to work or because work is coming ever closer or when life with 3 small children gets a little crazy or when I feel like things aren't going the way I would like them to or expected them to. I told this to my OB and she said that this is all normal - which I'm sure it is - but it felt weird for me to talk about it, so I'm not sure how it will go when seeing a psychologist. It was one thing to talk about with others who have gone through the same thing (as with my support group), but when it is just one on one? I don't know - I'll try it out and see how it goes.

Talking Toddlers

Ben & Ella have started to say a lot more words lately. Benjamin's new words include buckle and glasses. Ella's include milk and "I want down". Both have sorta figured out how to put their puzzle pieces together with the appropriate pieces - I got them puzzle pieces where you have to match the color with the right animal or where you have to match the tail with the head of the animal.

It's cute because Benjamin will ask "what's that?" and if you answer the wrong thing, he will say "no! What's that?" - so he very well know what it is but he wants you to say it. Ella has done that a few times.

The other day, we went to the beach and the twins were not at all thrilled with the water coming up on them. Benjamin did seem very interested in the seashells. Ella wanted to touch a dead crab before I told her no. We had a pretty good time - they were very tired, though, by the time we left.

In a little over 2 weeks, they turn 2 years old. Where did the time go? We're having a b-day party at a nearby park on the 20th (their b-day is the 12th). I'm looking forward to it. We are also taking them to the zoo on their actual birthday - it will be their first time there - I'm certain they will enjoy it after reading all these books about animals. I haven't been there in a long time, so it will be fun for me as well!

3 months old

Nicholas is now 3 months old as of Monday. It's amazing how much time flies! He smiles a lot and has the most gorgeous eyes. I've gotten him to laugh a few times - what a wonderful sound that is. He's rolled over from his tummy to his back twice and hasn't done it since, but he's a pro at lifting that head when he's doing his tummy time. He will sit in the bouncy seat and smile at the cow, pig and lamb. And what's cute is that he was smiling at the fish on the swing - the same fish that Ella smiled at when she was little. I was trying to find the photo of her in that swing, but I couldn't find it.

He's becoming a better sleeper at night - he'll wake up once or twice at night. Usually just the one time to eat - the other time for some comfort or he got out of his swaddle. He takes a good long nap in the afternoon these days. In the morning, we run errands so the afternoon is when he gets to sleep in his own bed.

In a couple weeks, I'll be back at work and I won't get to spend as much time with Nicholas as I do now. Jon will be staying at home with him for about a month, then it's off to the same daycare that Ben & Ella go to.

Next week, we are heading over to Spokane for a few days to introduce the new guy to friends and family. It's been a while since we were last there - September, so the twins are quite a bit bigger too. We'll be staying at a hotel, so hopefully that will be a good experience for us!

I haven't posted Nicholas's 3 month pics yet, but will soon. in the meantime, enjoy some pics of us at the beach. www.flickr.com/photos/heathercim

Fun with Sunscreen Lotion

I put Ben & Ella down for a nap around 1:15 or so. I expect playing for a little while but eventually, they fall asleep. Not so much today. I would hear giggles, then screams, so I'd go check on them. Most times, it was because they were fighting over a toy or a doll. Well, one time, it wasn't that. Around 2:30 or so, I hear screaming and so I go check (all the while, I'm trying to take a little rest myself - I'm exhausted and not feeling so well). I open the door and see that they had found some sunscreen lotion (I think from one of our diaper bags/backpacks) and had smeared it all over themselves. It doesn't look like any got in the eye or mouth, but I suppose I don't know for sure. So I had to take them out and give them a bath, change the sheets of the one bed covered in lotion. After the bath, I tried to get them to take a nap again. It just wasn't happening today so they came out of their room about 3:15 for good. And no, I didn't take a picture though I should have.

Guess what they are doing now - napping. It is now 6:08 p.m. here and Ella started to fall asleep on the floor so I took her to her bed and then Benjamin (while screaming - he wanted to go outside). I'm going to have to wake them up soon so they will go to bed at a decent hour and have dinner at a decent hour unlike last night when they didn't have dinner until 8 b/c I wasn't feeling well, then Jon took them outside while dinner was baking. The kids insisted on walking, so he took them to the park and I had to go rescue him otherwise, they would have been at the park until they wanted to fall asleep and well, I don't think Jon would have liked to carry two sleepy toddlers all the way home while carrying an infant in a Bjorn. I stayed at home b/c I wasn't feeling so great. I think I'm not feeling well b/c of my incredible exhaustion not because of a bug. Nicholas has decided to go back to waking every 3-4 hours - he had been going 5-6 hours.

I really, really wish that I could have someone come help me one day a week so I can feel like I can take a nap - I feel as if I need to get things done while Nicholas naps (and the twins if they are here) because I can't get it done while they are awake. The person that helped us last time once a week (MIL) is for some unclear reason not able to come help or something. I don't know. I wish I knew what was going on there.

Anyway, that's all. I'm off to go make dinner and have it all ready by the time the twins get up, so they can eat, then go play outside for a while and then go to bed at a decent time. Contrary to what you may think, having them go to bed later does not mean that they will wake up later.

Actually, one last thing, what does one get their childcare provider/preschool teacher for childcare appreciation day (which is apparently tomorrow and my daycare is taking the day off - I do not remember them doing this last year but they said it is in their policy and I don't know where I put that).

before I forget and while I have time

Last Thursday (04/30/09), Nicholas rolled over from his tummy to his back. He's done it twice now! Yay, Nicholas! Nicholas likes to sleep in someone's arms or nearby someone - he does not like to wake up and find you are not near him. He screams out and gets bright red if he wakes up and he's in the bouncy seat or his cosleeper bed. Trying to do chores with him in a bjorn is rather tiring rather quickly.

A new word for both Benjamin and Ella - duck. And apparently, since chicks are yellow like the ducks they see in their books, chicks are also ducks.

Whenever they leave a room, they like to say "bye bye, see you". They don't like it when Jon leaves without them in the morning because usually when Jon gets ready to go, it's time to go to a park and play outside! Though it was pouring rain this morning, so I don't think it would have been that much fun, but then again, they didn't seem to mind it the other day.

I will be making attempt #2 tomorrow to see a movie with Nicholas for the mom & me movie time - last time, it didn't work so well since traffic to the other side of the lake was horrible (at least on 520).

That's all for now.