Bittersweet Goodbye

I had to say goodbye to my support group over e-mail rather than in person. I really would have loved to have said goodbye (or a see ya later) in person this coming Tuesday, but I just didn't feel right about going to the meeting this next Tuesday when others who left before me didn't get to go to the meetings at this point in their pregnancy. It especially didn't feel right when one of the ladies got some bad news this past week.

I am going to miss them so much. When I wrote the e-mail to them (while at work), I couldn't help but tear up - much like I'm doing now writing about it. These ladies have meant so much to me. If it wasn't for them, I don't know how long it would have taken me to go back to the RE and to continue to pursue fertility treatments. I don't know if I could have made it through the negatives of the two IUIs this year if it wasn't for them. I don't know if I could have made it through the IVF cycle if it wasn't for them. They gave me the support, along with all of you, when I needed it.

I can't believe how much this is hurting me to not have this group anymore.I had no idea it would hurt me to this degree. I feel like I'm losing so much of who I am today. And to think someone once told me I should ditch the group so that I would stop thinking about my infertility so much. This is definitely a bittersweet ending to my membership in this group.

I am so grateful for them. I hope and pray that the three ladies left in the group find their way to parenthood soon, so we can enjoy being parents together. Thank you to my ladies of Tuesday night.