Felt the need to write this...

A while back, I came across a blog that was all about putting down people who did any type of ART, especially if they used donor eggs or sperm (I'm sure some of you may have heard of this blog). Against my better judgment, I have to read at what craziness she writes. I guess it's like looking at the car wreck on the side of the freeway - you can't help but to look.

Anyway, today she's irritated me more so than before by something that I've heard numerous times that those who use ART are being selfish, self-centered or lack empathy. O.K. I haven't heard the lack of empathy part before - how in the world do any of us lack empathy? The infertile community is a wonderful group of women and men who have nothing but empathy for others. We support each other through so much - I just don't know where she's coming from on that one and I just don't know how to even respond to her - it's just unbelievable the things she says.

And the selfish and self-centered - I've heard this before. This statement usually comes around the time someone says to infertile couples to "just adopt" because we all know that it should rest on infertile couples to adopt while fertile couples shouldn't have to deal with such things. If infertile people are selfish and self-centered for wanting to have children and thus, use ART to get there, I would think that anyone who chooses to have sex to become pregnant are also selfish and self-centered.

I don't consider having children to be a selfish and self-centered thing to do. If anything, it seems like you're being anything but selfish and self-centered as you are devoting your life to another human being and putting their needs above your own. Is that really selfish and self-centered?