Tidbits of News

First, I still have no clue what we're doing to get $$$ for the IVF shared risk program. We went to talk to another bank this morning, and I'm just incredibly confused and nervous about the whole thing. Really, the decision is whether to get a home equity loan or a home equity line of credit. I'm not sure! And let me just say that I don't want to borrow money to do this, but it feels like it is the best option for us so we can get started without too much delay. Hopefully, with using the part of the medical costs associated with this and the interest off the loan/line of credit on our taxes, we'll get a good size tax refund to help pay back whatever we get from the bank.

Second, just a cute story. Sophie, one of my kitties, is upstairs in our office with me and she's sitting on the window sill looking outside (don't worry, there is no way she could fall down) and the wind is blowing through her long fur and she looks like she is having the best time right now with the nice breeze. So cute!

Third, I went on a walk the other night with a friend of mine from work. I told her of our plans to get a loan/line of credit and she thinks that it would be a bad idea for us. She gives me all these doomsday scenarios to sufficiently freak me out about it. And it kinda annoyed me. It's not like I want to do this, but I really don't see much of a choice for me right now...unless my grandmother suddenly decides to lend me the money (I'm not holding my breath). Plus, I feel like we'll be able to pay a good portion of it with our tax refund and along the way through these cycles. I don't think it will bankrupt us or even close to doing that. And if it doesn't work, we'll get 70% of our money back! But I hope and pray that it works (the sooner, the better)!!! We've made our decision that this is the route we are going to take. I just don't need to be scared about this even more so than I already am! Oh and after she asked me if I was sick of hearing about her leg injury, I jokingly asked her if she was sick of me talking about my infertility treatments, and she responded with "I don't have to sit next to you anymore" - what does that mean? She is sick of me talking about this? Are my friends sick of me talking about this?

Fourth, it's completely ridiculous of me to even have a miniscule amount of hope, but I have a teensy bit of hope that the 1 in a zillion chance of us conceiving naturally will happen this cycle. I don't know why I feel this way because I know that there really is NO chance of it happening naturally, but I can't help myself. I'm holding on to our one last hope before we move onto IVF. My husband told me yesterday before I even told him my silly little feelings of hope that he was feeling the same way. However, this morning, my temp appears to have dropped - which, even though this cycle has been incredibly long, seems like too soon for the luteal phase to be over. My luteal phase has always seemed to have been around 14 days no matter when ovulation happened - that is, before the last IUI cycle when the luteal phase was so very short. So I don't know what to think - AF could be showing up tomorrow or the next day or the temp could've been wrong. I'll see soon.

And finally, I got my Garmin Forerunner! I can't wait to use it. Perhaps tomorrow during my walk at lunch!