Guilt

As I was thinking of our plans for the weekend, I just started feeling so incredibly guilty for leaving Ben & Ella for 3 nights and 4 days in a couple weeks to go to Vegas. I hardly get to see them during the week, so I try to spend as much time as I can with them during the weekend so it makes it hard to plan time with friends if those plans involve events that are not toddler friendly. This, of course, leads to me feeling as if I'm losing friendships and my whole life will be my job and my family and that's it. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely adore my children and I'm feeling good about having another child (anxiously waiting for August 22 for the NT scan). I wouldn't trade them for anything, but one needs friends too, I think. So I guess the trip to Vegas will be good for me.

This weekend, my plans include going on a date with my husband (something we haven't done in a while) - the date is during the day so I'll miss some time with my children. I'm looking forward to the date, but because of the date, however, my other plans for the weekend must include my children. I want to be around them as much as possible before they don't want to be around me anymore, and just a few hours on Saturday is all I can spare.

We were going to have a playdate on Saturday with an ex-coworker and her child, but unfortunately, she couldn't get together due to a last minute change in plans so the lunch date with my husband is now happening. Yay for lunch dates with hubbies!