Desperately Seeking Baby...Babies Found

My thoughts on raising twins and a singleton after infertility.

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Tuesday, July 22, 2008

You Had Better Sit Down For This - HUGE shock lie ahead

We are in complete shock. Never did it cross my mind that this would least not without the help of the medical profession. NEVER.

I haven't been very good at keeping track of my period cycles ever since we had the twins, but I just had a feeling something was going on. I had a dream that I was pregnant and I woke up truly believing that was the truth though I went on to deny it to myself because hello? I needed medical help before. It wasn't until I woke up with sore breasts and a slight feeling of nausea that I was thinking maybe that dream was telling me something. Only then did I try to remember when my last period was - I guessed that it was around the time we went on a picnic with friends because I remember feeling crampy that day. I told Jon that I thought I was late, but again, I was thinking, it was just late. My cycles were always wonky before the twins so maybe they are just being wonky again, but just for ease of mind, I asked Jon to get a test when he went to the store so I could test the next morning.

And well, it came back positive. Right away, it came back positive.
I have to admit my first reaction was shock combined with fear as to how we will manage to financially take care of 3 children - I suppose for many of you reading this, your first reaction would have been sheer joy at getting pregnant without a medical professional poking and prodding you. And while, I do have that feeling, my first reaction was fear and shock. Now, my feelings are, I am grateful though the fear and shock are still there. I want to enjoy this pregnancy.

I took another test a few days later, and it also came back positive. The day I took the first test, I called my OB's office and made an appointment. 3 weeks later, Jon and I stroll into the OB's office to visit with the NP (as that's who you see first and they don't see you until you are at least 8 weeks along). At first, she felt my tummy and said "you feel bigger than 8 weeks." OMG - it cannot be more than one in there. She did the ultrasound and the baby is measuring about 7 weeks 5 days and there is a heartbeat. At that point, I said, "so it's real." I was so relieved to see the heartbeat.

Next up, was the bloodwork and well, as usual, it took about 5 or so needle pokes and 2 phlebotomists to get blood from me.

So, we are extremely happy and grateful we get to have a third child - and this time naturally. At the same time, we are in shock and wonder what our future might hold for us. I haven't told my support group - deciding to wait until later after one of the ladies in my group announces the birth of her daughter that she will be adopting. I hope that they won't hate me as I hope that those of you still reading this that are in still on the inferility rollercoaster won't hate me.

And I just want to mention the following:

Inevitably, someone will say to me (again) - "all you needed to do was relax and it would happen all on its own!" This response drives me crazy. First of all, 3 different medical professionals said IVF was our best route - WHY? Because my fallopian tubes were messed up. And honestly, I think I was the most stressed out during IVF and I ended up pregnant with twins. Jon and I are convinced during the pregnancy, the twins straightened things out - they did some repair work while in the womb. :-D

Some will wonder why we didn't use birth control. We tried for nearly 5 years before we tried IVF and got pregnant, so I really didn't think we needed birth control considering how hard it was to get pregnant the first time.

Another thing I've heard - from a friend at work and the WW person when I said I needed to quit WW - that a friend of theirs got pregnant the same way - after doing IVF, then they got pregnant naturally. That's great that they know people like that, but it bothers me. Why do people automatically assume that if one person they know this happened for, it will happen for everyone?



  • At 1:55 PM , Blogger kellg said...


    Congratulations! I'm so happy for you guys. We have had the same discussions -- was it that we were relaxed or did being pregnant via IVF "fix" things. Don't worry about it -- just enjoy the "free" and "natural" part. And don't worry that people will stop liking you because you're no longer a "good" infertile. Deep down, I think all infertiles hope that they'll get a "freebie" after treatment. So again, enjoy this.

  • At 4:09 PM , Blogger Hopeful Mother said...

    NO WAY! What a pleasant and unexpected surprise. I am really happy for you guys!

  • At 4:18 PM , Blogger Heather said...

    Congratulations! I'll be honest, you can use me as a story of who that doesn't happen to. We had IF treatments for our daughter and hoped the next would come easy. Now she's almost 8 years old and I'm sitting here on bedrest after my embryo transfer. I do plan on going on BCPs after any potential pregnancy, because my luck would be that I'd be in my forties and get pregnant accidentally.

    Lots of luck!!! I am so happy for you!!!

  • At 5:37 PM , Blogger Lollipop Goldstein said...

    I was sitting and I still almost fell out of my chair. Congratulations! That is fantastic news :-) Okay, scary fantastic news, but fantastic news nonetheless.

  • At 6:22 AM , Blogger Sunny said...

    WONDERFUL news!!!!

  • At 6:26 AM , Anonymous amanda said...


  • At 1:20 PM , Blogger I Believe in Miracles said...

    Congratulations on your little miracle!! What an awesome surprise. I love how the practical in you also comes out too. :o)
    I hope you get to enjoy this pregnancy without the same stress you went through after the IVF.

  • At 1:20 PM , Blogger SAHW said...

    From L&F...congratulations!! I'm sure it was a shock, but it sounds like an awesome shock to have!

  • At 2:03 PM , Blogger ms. c said...

    WOW wow wow!
    Many congrats. I wish you an easy rest of the pregnancy.

  • At 2:33 PM , Blogger My Reality said...

    Huge congrats, Heather!! What a wonderful surprise!

  • At 4:47 PM , Blogger Kerry Lynn said...

    OMG! Didn't see that one coming!

    I completely understand all of your feelings.

    I did go on BC right after because I knew I would be the one to accidentally get pregnant after needing so much help. I have sinced stopped it and haven't had a period. So I'm not too worried.

    I know we would both be shocked and scared. I think that's normal.

    So how far along are you??

    At least it's not twins ;-)

    Congratulations! I'm very happy to hear your news.

  • At 9:12 AM , Blogger Karen said...

    Huge hooray! I know it's scary and weird and unexpected, but huge hooray, nevertheless!

    As for all the stupid asinine comments you're bound to get... I made up my mind that if I happened to get pregnant without assistance (HAH!), I will simply refuse to tell anyone what the circumstances of my pregnancy are. It's none of anyone's business. I'm so sick of people telling me that now that I've got the triplets, it's just going to be "boom, bang, boom, you're pregnant!" Hello? it doesn't always work that way! And maybe I'm not the only problem!

    I'm very happy for you!


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