Why are People so Heartless?
I came across this blog a while back that's sole purpose is to make fun of other people - I won't link to it because I don't want to encourage this even more, but I just wanted to comment on it. One type of blog that they apparently think is so incredibly funny is infertility blogs. None of these people, including their readers, seem to even want to try to understand how hard infertility is on a person - both male and female. They can't possibly grasp that this can be just as devastating as other issues that people can go through in their lives. It is like we are grieving each and every time AF shows up. I, like so many others in blogland, need support to get through this - which is why so many of us blog - so we know we are not alone in this.
Last night, I was starting to feel hopeful. I was thinking about how great it would be if the doctor gave us the o.k. to do an IUI, and then it worked! How happy I would be that the second I knew, the whole world would know. I was feeling good about things, then it just seemed like my little tiny bubble of hope burst. I went back to how depressed I am that I am going through this. That I have to take Clomid to help me get pregnant; that I have to spend so much money on something that so many people take for granted.
This morning, I was in my vanpool into work, and right there in the middle of the floor between the driver's seat and the passenger seat was a pregnancy book. And I wondered why she couldn't have possibly put that book in her bag. She just had to leave it out for me to see. Then she went on to complain about being pregnant! My husband tells me that when I finally get pregnant, I will be the happiest pregnant woman in the world - even while I'm feeling nauseous. I'll be happy because I'm pregnant! I really want to tell this person that at least, she's pregnant. At least, she didn't have to go through fertility treatments to get her baby. This morning, I did have my iPod, but I can only turn it up so high. And I dread the times when it is just me and her in the van because she will feel the need to talk about her pregnancy and will bring it up whichever way she can.
Oh, and this morning, I saw her in the deli and she went up and told this other person that she was pregnant and the other girl squealed and gave her a big hug. And that just upset me even more not because I'm not happy for her, but because I want that to be me!
Hopefully, I get out of this funk soon. Tonight I'm supposed to go to a Bachelorette party, so I should probably be in a better mood before then.
On another note, unfortunately, I'm going to miss the UW-UConn game - so Go Huskies (that would be UW Huskies (my alma mater) - not the UConn Huskies)!
:-)
Oh, and what a heartbreaking loss for Gonzaga. I felt so bad for Adam Morrison last night. :-(
(I'm from Spokane - I have to root for the home team)!
Last night, I was starting to feel hopeful. I was thinking about how great it would be if the doctor gave us the o.k. to do an IUI, and then it worked! How happy I would be that the second I knew, the whole world would know. I was feeling good about things, then it just seemed like my little tiny bubble of hope burst. I went back to how depressed I am that I am going through this. That I have to take Clomid to help me get pregnant; that I have to spend so much money on something that so many people take for granted.
This morning, I was in my vanpool into work, and right there in the middle of the floor between the driver's seat and the passenger seat was a pregnancy book. And I wondered why she couldn't have possibly put that book in her bag. She just had to leave it out for me to see. Then she went on to complain about being pregnant! My husband tells me that when I finally get pregnant, I will be the happiest pregnant woman in the world - even while I'm feeling nauseous. I'll be happy because I'm pregnant! I really want to tell this person that at least, she's pregnant. At least, she didn't have to go through fertility treatments to get her baby. This morning, I did have my iPod, but I can only turn it up so high. And I dread the times when it is just me and her in the van because she will feel the need to talk about her pregnancy and will bring it up whichever way she can.
Oh, and this morning, I saw her in the deli and she went up and told this other person that she was pregnant and the other girl squealed and gave her a big hug. And that just upset me even more not because I'm not happy for her, but because I want that to be me!
Hopefully, I get out of this funk soon. Tonight I'm supposed to go to a Bachelorette party, so I should probably be in a better mood before then.
On another note, unfortunately, I'm going to miss the UW-UConn game - so Go Huskies (that would be UW Huskies (my alma mater) - not the UConn Huskies)!
:-)
Oh, and what a heartbreaking loss for Gonzaga. I felt so bad for Adam Morrison last night. :-(
(I'm from Spokane - I have to root for the home team)!
posted by seattlegal @ 9:38 AM
5 Comments:
At 1:30 PM ,
Anonymous said...
I don't know what to say about the cruelty of some people but I suspect they have their own problems - ones I'd rather not have as sucky as IF is.
Sorry to hear about the vanpool lady. Use that ipod even if she's the only other person in the van. Keep that sucker charged!
At 5:38 PM ,
Ladybug Ann said...
I think the vanpool woman is being a *little* insensitive. She does know about you TTC, right? It's like complaining about your mortgage at a homeless shelter. Does she really expect you to make little comforting noises?
As for the website, I think I know the one you are talking about. Very mean, in fact, some of the sound so darn smug.
I'm sorry you're in a funk. There are days when I feel like my insides are screaming. Clomid doesn't help with improving moods.
At 4:49 PM ,
x said...
Reading that there is a blog out there that makes fun of infertility blogs makes me sad. Why do people use us as a target, I don't get it.
Preg car pool, OMG. Start wearing really heavy perfume and help her morning sickness along.
At 8:38 PM ,
TiggleBitties said...
Wow, is there really a blog that makes fun of IFer's? What's next? The blind? The deaf? Gimme a break. The only thing I can say about that blog is that Karma is a bitch and a half. Nuff said bout that!
I think preggy carpool lady is not thinking straight. If she had one iota of sense in her head, she would know better. Let's chalk it up to hormones on her part and hope we don't do the same when we are in her shoes...though, I kinda agree with Jenny to a point. Shower in the perfume! LOL
At 3:52 PM ,
Elle Darcy said...
My husband and I are also dealing with infertility. It can be hard, but I try not to think about it too much. It doesn't upset me until I hear someone complaining about their pregnancy (people really do take it for granted). Here we are struggling, taking daily temperatures, seeing doctors and they seem put out by the ease with which they got pregnant. I also had a dream last night that I was pregnant. I was surprised at how overwhelmed with joy I was. I think sometimes, in trying not to concentrate on my inability to conceive, I push away my feelings of wanting a baby. Anyhow, your post just reminded me of how much sadness can come with being unable to have children. I wish you lots of luck in the future.
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